Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the "Any" key is. AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The ...
When you call us to have your computer moved, be sure to leave it buried under half a ton of postcards, baby pictures, stuffed animals, dried flowers, bowling trophies and children's art. We don't have a life, and we find it deeply moving to catch a fleet ...
BOBBIT VIRUS: Removes a vital part of your hard disk, then reattaches it. Unfortunately, the area is permanently disabled. OPRAH WINFREY VIRUS: Your 200 MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80 MB,and then slowly expands back to 200 MB. AT&T VIRUS: Ev ...
Bill Gates, Andy Grove, & Jerry sanders (CEOs of Microsoft, Intel & AMD) were in a high-powered business meeting. During the serious, tense discussions, a beeping noise was suddenly emitted from where Bill was sitting. Bill said : "Oh! that's my emerge ...
It's wise to remember how easily this wonderful technology can be misused, sometimes unintentionally, with serious consequences. Consider the case of the Illinois man who left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a ...
A truck driver hauling a tractor-trailer load of computers stops for a beer. As he approaches the bar he sees a big sign on the door saying "NERDS NOT ALLOWED--ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK!" He goes in and sits down. The bartender comes over to him, sniff ...
If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port, And the bus is interrupted as a very last resort, And the address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort, Then the socket packet pocket has an error to report! If your cursor finds a menu item fol ...
[To the tune of "American Pie"] A long, long, time ago I can still remember when I dialed up their help desk lines. And I knew if I had the chance They could make my modem dance with chats and GIFs and silly pick-up lines. But Help Desk phone ...
Bill Gates is hanging out with the chairman of General Motors. 'If automotive technology had kept pace with computer technology over the past few decades,' boasts Gates, 'you would now be driving a V-32 instead of a V-8, and it would have a top speed of 1 ...
There was once a COBOL programmer in the mid to late 1990s. For the sake of this story, we'll call him Jack. After years of being taken for granted and treated as a technological dinosaur by all the UNIX programmers and Client/Server programmers and websi ...
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