Funny Jokes and Pictures!

(1) Neighbours Car

A man buys a huge new car and shows it to his neighbour. Its great says the neighbour but does it have a bed in like mine? But your car is tiny says the man. Yes but watch this, the neighbour presses a button on his tiny car's dashboard and a bed unfolds. ...

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(2) Shower Curtain

"What's the difference between a shower curtain and toilet paper?" "I don't know." "Oh, so it was you!" ...

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(3) Blacksmith

A tourist visiting old Tucson strolled to a blacksmith's shop just after the smithy had placed a red-hot horseshoe on a metal bench. Before he could be warned, the oblivious visitor picked up the shoe, then instantly dropped it. "Are you badly burned?" th ...

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(4) Psychiatric Hotline

Recording - "Hello, Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline." If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2. If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5 and 6. If you are paranoi ...

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(5) Affair

Two women meet at the gates of heaven 1st woman:howd you die? 2nd woman:froze to death, you? 1st woman:Heart attack, I thought my husband was having an affair so I ran all around the house looking for the woman and when Ii couldnt find her I was so wor ...

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(6) The Lizard and the monkey

There was a lizard who was walking though the jungle and he spots a monkey in the tree. So he yells up to the monkey "What are you doing ?" And the monkey replys "Smoking weed " So the lizard joins him. Later the lizard gets thirsty and goes ...

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(7) Knock

Knock knock Whos there? Eggburt Eggburt who? Eggburt no bacon. ...

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(8) Funny old man

An old man goes to the doctors and ask the doctor to lower his sex drive. The doctor says, what?, your 86, its all in your head. That's right says the old man, I want you to lower it! ...

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